Organising a wedding is hard enough by itself. But dealing with plus one drama makes it even worse. You somehow have to explain who can come (and who can’t), which is never a good experience. 

 

This post takes a look at managing plus one drama and what you need to do. Here’s everything to know: 

 

Where Does Plus-One Drama Come From? 

 

Unfortunately, plus one drama can come from all sorts of areas. In some situations, you might not want someone to come because of a recent break-up – that’s always awkward.

 

In other cases, you might also have undecided guests. Their relationships might not be as stable and secure as they would like, and you don’t want to lay table seating just in case they don’t show up. 

 

Then there are boundary issues. You simply don’t want some people to be there. Perhaps you had a run-in with them in the past, or you’re worried about what they’ll say to other guests. 

 

Finally, plus-one drama can sometimes come from your partner. They might want to invite their friends and partners, but you don’t. 

 

How To Deal With Plus-One Drama

 

 

Fortunately, there are several ways you can deal with plus-one drama and prevent it from becoming the story that dominates your wedding. You don’t want to get into a situation where everyone seems happy, except you. 

 

Delegate

 

One option if you’re a conflict-avoiding individual is to delegate. Passing the job of organising invitations over to a family member takes the pressure off you. It’s not you who’s having to tell Aunty Mabel she can’t bring her new boyfriend with her. 

 

The best people for this job are the toughest souls in your family. Putting them in charge of sending each postcard to your guests exonerates you from responsibility. 

 

Be Fair

 

Next, ensure that you’re always fair when applying a plus-one policy. Don’t allow some people to bring their partners but not others. That’s never going to go down well. 

 

The trick here is to send invitations to individual people you know. This way, you can specify exactly who’s on the list. 

 

For example, you should send invitations to both parties in a couple (and even the kids if they have a family). Providing them with invitations on an individual basis clears up any confusion about bringing partners. 

 

Put A Note

 

You could also say that you don’t have a plus one policy at your wedding. Instead, only guests with invitations addressed to them can attend. 

 

Placing the note high on the invitation makes it simpler for everyone to see. It also removes any claims of unfair treatment. 

 

Make sure that if you invite the partners on your side of the family you do the same for the groom. Otherwise, you could again receive accusations of unfairness. 

 

Develop Alternatives

 

Lastly, you could explore alternatives. Plus ones might be okay at the reception but not at the ceremony if you’re limited for space, or vice versa. Keep it as flexible as possible while explaining why you’re doing it to your guests at the same time.